Why Rush To Grow Up?

 

I make no apologies for some of my less “adulty” behaviors.  I read comic books, play video games, and am wearing stormtrooper socks as I write this.  I love that my daughter likes to play with the same kinds of toys that I do and even though I don’t think that I’ve ever played with them without her, it really wouldn’t be that far out of character.

Being a parent is awesome, but it is also a constant reminder of how bad being an adult sucks, of how much better life was as a little kid, oblivious to the stresses and terrors of the outside world.  To live in a bubble of love and security, your every need provided for by others. How many times this year have you turned off the news and wanted nothing more than for somebody to tuck you into bed, read you a story and tell you that everything is going to be all right.  Wanted nothing more than to be able to truly believe that?

We spend too much of our early lives wishing that we were older.  To have more freedoms, more autonomy.  I started working at my current job when I was nineteen, moved out of my parent’s home at twenty, and was married for the first time at twenty-one.  I was also divorced for the first time at twenty-one, in such a rush to be a grown up but with no idea of how to actually do that successfully.

The teenager will be eighteen this fall, a date that she anxiously awaits.   Eighteen means that she can get her own apartment, spend her money however she sees fit, acquire her driver’s licence without having to meet our preconditions. She races down the road to adulthood, oblivious to the reality of what is really around that corner.

Her little sister is the same, constantly telling us all the things that she will be able to do once she “gets to be a teenager.”  She won’t watch any cartoons that she enjoyed last year because she’s “five now.”  Only kindergarten level cartoons such as Spongebob will do. She no longer will drink a “baby” juice box at snack time, needing either a grown up juice box or her water bottle.  Her Minions water bottle of course, not the Dora the Explorer one that she got when she was little.  A Frozen lunch bag is apparently still acceptable.

 

Dont Hurry To Grow Up

 

There are cracks in the facade.  They both seem to be enjoying the new coloring books they received at Christmas.  Alaina  tried to switch channels as I was coming downstairs this morning, but I know that was the theme from Franklin and Friends that I heard.

The holiday season is  now behind us, the accompanying school and work breaks over.  Cold, dark mornings, copious coffee consumption, show shoveling and heating bills the only things to look forward to in the foreseeable future.  Adulting starts back up with that first reluctant setting of my alarm.

There is a lot of good that comes with being a grown up.  I can stay up as late as I want to, eat whatever I want, and will never be told that I am too short to go on a roller coaster.

There are a lot of times though, when I miss the days when there was somebody besides my wife making decisions for me and I was perfectly content with a mall mechanical bull.

 

Dont Rush to Grow Up

 

 

 

57 thoughts on “Why Rush To Grow Up?”

  1. I definitely understand this. Although, to be honest, as I make that bubble of safety and love for my daughters I feel it a little more intensely than I did when I was not a parent and I like that.

    Also, I have been (in an admittedly weird way) been looking forward to the big 3-0. Maybe this is egotistical, but I consider myself to be a pretty intelligent person and it drives me batty when people tell me that I “look pretty young so I must not know what I’m talking about.” I look forward to looking old enough for people to take me seriously.

    1. I can understand that. Unfortunately my grey hair doesn’t make me look intelligent or distinguished. It just makes me look old.

  2. Yes like you I look back with fondness at my carefree childhood days and regret at just how quickly I wanted them to end.

    It’s not so much having someone make decisions, more the freedom of just doing things. Running through the woods playing fox and the hounds, endless hours spent playing football/soccer.

    The only worry was homework.

    I try to tell my kids to slow down and just enjoy being kids. They don’t listen to an middle aged man like me. What do I Know??

  3. Being an adult is definitely overrated 😉 The older you get, the more you understand and appreciate your parents, at least that’s my experience. Now that I’m a parent myself, I understand them even better. We try so hard to give our kids the best childhood experience we can. Hopefully one day they’ll appreciate it. #TuesdayTreasures

  4. Aww. I totally understand both sides of the argument. Hopefully you can enjoy your youngest’s childhood just a bit longer (even if she doesn’t seem to) and you can help your oldest learn to navigate adulthood wisely. You have quite the 2017 ahead! Best of luck! 🙂 #bestandworst

  5. This is weird as my 3 year old was saying she wanted to be a grown up in the car today. She couldn’t tell me why but I told her exactly why being a kid was better. She then changed her mind! At 18 you know nothing. I thought I wanted a baby at 21….I waited another 7 years thank god! Thanks for sharing with #bestandworst x

  6. #tuesdaytreasure there is a pushchair theory that we spend the first 3 years trying to break out and the next 80 odd trying to get back. I agree – where possible, slow down.

  7. They have no idea the madness that awaits them on the other side of eighteen, do they?

    My son says he can’t take KoolAid Bursts in his lunch anymore, only KoolAid Jammers or Gatorade. Sigh. It’s so cliche but it wasn’t a lie when EVERYONE told me “they grow up so quickly.”

    Hang in there, Dad!

  8. Youth is wasted on the young, right? Time always seemed to move so slowly when I was young, but now it just flies way too quickly. I don’t think there’s anything we can tell them to make them understand, though. At least she’s still willing to ride the mechanical bull!

  9. My daughter is 11 and I really want her to stay a kid as long as possible. It is hard though as all her friends are doing more “grown up” things she wants to do them as well. I keep telling her to enjoy things while she can.
    #FamilyFun

    1. It is hard. We have a 17 year old in addition to the 5 year old, and I think the additional freedoms and privileges she has will always be something the little one notices

  10. Ha we certainly do have similar posts, absolutely great minds and all that. As you can imagine I totally hear what you are saying and am all about enjoying the youth while you are in it! Thanks for joining us at #Familyfun

  11. We don’t appreciate childhood till it’s over do we? I guess that is why we kind of get a repeat as parents? I am all about watching the toons and playing with the kids. It’s more fun somedays than adulting 🙂

  12. How we all wish we can return back in time. Its only adulthood when we start appreciating childhood. Watching your children grow is a bliss and teaches you a lot. Isn’t it?

  13. You’re absolutely right and I think only people who had horrible childhoods would not find this post completely relatable. We just don’t know how good we have it until it’s gone. But in a way I think kids are wired to want to be grown up by nature. Kids mimic what they perceive as adult behaviours so that they can learn how tp be functional adults. If they didn’t want to be grown up they would have no desire to mimic those behaviours. #KCACOLS

    1. I think with mine its about independence. They seem to think adults get to do whatever they want. Couldn’t be farther from the truth!

  14. I think all children are the same. I couldn’t wait to grown up and leave home. It’s exactly what I did at 18 years old and I completely underestimated how hard it would be! I stuck it out but looking back I wish I would have enjoyed my youth before I started worry about paying bills etc. It would have meant living by my mums rules but would that have really been so bad?! #kcacols

  15. My baby is also going to be 18 this year! And I have 1 in diapers still (and 2 more in-between). I can’t believe how crazy fast life goes. Especially because I remember when my parents turned 40 and what i felt like at that age and how old they seemed and now I’m nearing that number myself! LOL Thanks for sharing. #KCACOLS

  16. What is being a grown up anyway? My five year old is the same, ‘when I am big I can do this’, ‘I want to be eleven’, ‘I want to be a grown up so I can be a dad!’. And all the time I tell him like today, enjoy being little. The older I get the more I want to regress and go back to school! Thank you for linking up to #KCACOLS and I hope you join us next time x

  17. I got told over a year ago – I couldn’t work in the dispensary unless I grew up (btw I’m 34). Then a month later after he left we were so short staffed I was allowed to start my training. I’ve been doing to for a year now and still haven’t grown up. I don’t see what difference it made – I like to enjoy my life and laugh and play games. I also work my ass off.

    People grow up too soon. I refuse. #kcacols

  18. It’s so true! Growing up all I ever wanted was to be grown up. Now all I want is to go back to those carefree days where I didn’t have a care in the world. As parents, I think it’s important we do what we can to try and allow our kids to go as long as we can without having to worry about anything. However, we have to delicately balance this with not raising sheltered little people that don’t understand the world. Argh why does it al have to be so hard? #KCACOLS

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