I Don’t Want To Share


We all know that the single greatest influence of our children’s behaviors , at least in the early years, is ourselves. They are constantly watching our every move, listening to every word, mimicking both consciously and unconsciously. It’s a huge responsibility, the molding of a personality.

Some days we do a better job at being role models than others. For the past few weeks I have been a terrible example for one of the very first traits that we try and instill in them as future members of society. I have been a horrible sharer.

It’s not toys that I have been hoarding, not a secret stash of snacks that I have been hiding from the kids or an expensive bottle of scotch that I only drink when my wife isn’t home.

I’ve been bad at sharing my daughter.

Seemingly every day there has been a request for her presence. Texts, phone calls, e-mails from parents of her friends wanting to know what we are doing, when we can schedule play dates and sleepovers. I’ve been ignoring them all.

There have been some legitimate reasons. My wife and I both worked the holiday and will be on again this weekend. She spent some time with my parents, went to a few parties with her other grammie.  The Connecticut Tigers  have begun their minor league baseball season and have been gracious enough to schedule a lot of home games on nights that I haven’t been working. I can’t say enough times how much of a great way this is to spend a summer evening.


Selfish with my kid
best smile I could get


Mainly though, I’ve just been selfish. I’ve had a few extra days off and I’ve been enjoying them, enjoying the extra time with the kids.  Lazy days reading by the pool, music pumping. Cannonballs, water gun fights, underwater races. After getting the television stuck and spending a morning watching woman’s college volleyball Alaina has invented her own version of the game, though I’m not sure about her score keeping. Yesterday she claimed to have beaten me 120-14.


a bad sharer
playing “volleyball”


Sooner than I’m ready, these days will pass. The fall will not only bring an end to our water sports but a return to school and the dramatic decrease in our time that my job imposes, a situation not likely to change soon.

So to anybody reading this that is among the snubbed, know that it isn’t personal. I’m sure that it won’t be long before I join your ranks, desperate for somebody else to amuse her for a few hours. I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t appreciate the few breaks that I’ve had, the blessed silence that is so unobtainable when she’s around.

Just don’t call me, I’ll call you.





26 thoughts on “I Don’t Want To Share”

  1. This is so sweet! I’ve been a bit selective about responding to playdate requests too – summers are so fleeting and I just want to enjoy the warm days with my little boys while they are still little! Visiting from #thatfridaylinky

  2. I totally get this! Not long ago though, our girls went over a school friends house for the first time without for me fr tea. I wasn’t sure how they’d be, but they just strolled in without looking back. They grow so quickly. Thanks for linking up to #ThatFridayLinky

  3. In a blink of an eye they have grown up I fully intend to take advantage though the holidays with the girls. Nothing wrong wrong with being a bit selfish great read Thanks for linking to the #THAT FRIDAY LINKY come back next week please

  4. Doesn’t sound like your daughter is desperate to spend time time with anyone else so I’d let it slide. You know when things get busy you can arrange play dates and so on. I wouldn’t worry, it will all work out in the end and you will be sharing time with your daughter soon enough. #thatfridaylinky

  5. I completely get this too! My son goes to his dads alternate weekends so on the weekends when he is here I don’t like to make plans and share him, I like to enjoy those moments just he and I, or the six of us, and I think that’s perfectly normal. #thatfridaylinky

  6. Ah that is lovely I can’t say I blame you. Like you say it passes so quick and I would hate to look back and think I didn’t make the most of it either. Enjoy your time together and all the fun and games in the pool – I am quite jealous of that. Thanks for joining us at #familyfun

  7. I don’t think anyone can blame you for that, like you say, this time passes all too quickly. My husband works away for 10 weeks at a time so when he’s home we are very selfish at turning down anything that gets in the way of us all spending as much time together as possible.

  8. Weekends are work days for Rev T so Saturday is our family day and we ain’t sharing either. It won’t be long before she’ll want to be with anyone but us, so we may as well enjoy it while it lasts. Not selfish at all to me! Enjoy!

    1. I’ve been surprised she hasn’t been more vocal in asking for playdates. What helps is that anytime we go to the park or virtually anywhere she finds a new best friend for the day

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